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Lyrics:
Mother Madness
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Mattutino
Entra l'antieroe dalla porta di una giornata, il mattutino.
Si guarda intorno come se non ci fosse stato, anche se in fondo è qui da sempre;
E'stanco, quella stanchezza di chi ha fatto poco, pensato tanto
E guardando attentamente notiamo che viene cullato dalla sua ombra...e viceversa...
Every day is a birth, it (was) born to give a sense
To what I always did... and nothing must ever change.
Mother, you cradle me...or are you inside of me?
Mother Madness, it's hard to understand
If I'm still dreaming or if I've always been awake;
I want to kidnap the instant of my thought,
That only glimmer of reality,
To not fear to deny myself with my contradictions.
But most of all I'm crushed
By the burden of having to look sincere, when I lie,
And having to look sincere
'Cause every motion will be understood too much
By who is sure to understand you
And you are only in the same instant in which you start to comprehend
Yourself
Mother madness, cradle me again...
Mother madness, cradle me again...
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Noumena
I live with strangers
Also if I’m here alone
I’m not pure as I was,
I’m not clear like I wanted to be.
Maybe I have to accept
That many souls cohabit in me,
I still wander if I
If I’m a rotten blossom or I
I’m just a bird that fears to fly
It’s not foreseen that I’ve to choose light
It’s not right always to give the best
It’s not strength tolerate kicks to my life
It’s not good all the good only ‘cause it's good
I want to give you satisfaction, I want to care you.
You give me all the attentions I need to survive.
I feel I’m One / No One / One Hundred Thousands, how I hate,
(That) I’m only an anti-hero in a story of decadent age.
I need to unite me, I need to go
But I hear souls call me, tempt me.
“It’s me,
I am the one”
That I always searched in all those years
Years and years passed searching noumena
I am a man and I am seeking my Itaca.
I believe I'm confused but I'm just so topical,
I'm a man and I am seeking my way.
In the frantic search of some false individuals,
I'm a man and I am seeking my diversity.
In my bed I fight fights for my ideals,
I'm a man and I'm seeking my functionality |
So, try to rest poor little man
And don’t take care of what
your mind says.
You’re just a man, you have to learn,
There are much more humans
than what you think.
You need to unite, you need to go
To take part in the big show.
Don’t care if you will be the first:
Curtains are opened, curtains exist
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It’s not foreseen that I’ve to choose dark
It’s not right if I don’t give the best
It’s not strength to get angry for everything
It’s not bad. It's not bad the bad ‘cause it's bad
I want to give you satisfaction, I want to care you
You give me all the attentions I need to survive.
I feel I’m One / No One / One Hundred Thousands, how I hate,
(That) I’m only an anti-hero in a story of decadent age.
I want to give you satisfaction, I want to care you
you give me all the attentions I need to survive.
I feel I’m One / No One / One Hundred Thousands, how I hate,
(That) I’m only an anti-hero in a story of decadent age.
I need to unite me, I need to go
But I hear souls call me, tempt me
“It’s me
I am the one”
That I always searched in all those years
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Mother Madness
Mirror, mirror,
What I have to see, now
That my eyes are open clearly
And I am starting to dig in me:
Condensed breath,
Fine wrap on my silicon shape,
Cannot hide the masks / Just another mask
Cannot hide the masks / Just another mask
Layers over layers cover me
I never find a way
To hold my life in my arms.
I know I’m going nowhere,
Where my dreams are pulled under.
I never find a way
To break your misconception of me:
Drowning, falling
In a cancerous jail for us
I’m so scared to make again a stupid mistake,
There are some bounds that part me from being
Under the masks, under the clothes,
Under this skin there is a chasm
So deep… so cold…
And I’m not here, I’m lost so far
Where all images stand:
Flashes, desires, memories,
Strike my soul, begin
To devour my sleepy mind,
Destroy the dreams I have inside
And the joy is far away, in perpetual yesterdays or tomorrows
Life is far away from here
From the beauty I need to see
Life is far away
Life is far away
Life is far away from here
From the beauty I need to see
Life is far away
Life is far away
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I fear
Nothing
Breaks,
Devours me
I fear
Nothing
Breaks,
Devours me |
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Voices are talking in my head, people scream out of my head
Voices are screaming in my head, people talk out of my head
They tell me
All I built turns to dust
She tells me
Sadness burns my heart, my eyes
I tell me
All I touch withers and dies.
Mother Madness
Bring me back home
Lay your fingers
Pulling on it
Touch and let me
Sweetly spasm |
Fast
Pierce
Suck slowly
Drown |
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Welcome home my sweet lil’child,
Sit down in front of me
I can sell you too many masks,
All you can take is all you can see:
Illusion, delusion, joy, happiness and why?
Why not sadness or pain?
Or illness, depression, pathetic romance,
Poisons of love, poisons of hate.
Just you…you have a nothin’ to do.
Kiss my lips…and say, say to me:
“You’re the one that will always be with me”
I never find a way
To hold my life in my arms.
I know I’m going nowhere,
Where my dreams are pulled under.
I never find a way
To break your misconception of me:
Drowning, falling
In a cancerous jail for us
I’m so scared to make again a stupid mistake,
There are some bounds that part me from being
Life is far away from here
From the beauty I need to see
Life is far away
Life is far away |
I fear
Nothing
Breaks,
Devours me |
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witHer
Like a flower I wither
Like an autumn leaf without Her
Why?
It’s all a game of a weary mind…
Empty trunks for my stolen dreams, I’m
looking at this world behind a barred mirror
Oh life, give me a shape that I can lose without sorrow,
Give me a name that I can waste for tomorrow
What remains of the early lives?
Just the grey that covers my eyes
And of the dreams where I laid?
Just my own demons
…the empty times…
…a life distorted…
…the falling…
…the everything…
There’s a nothing in my heart
It’s evolving, expanding
Everyday it says:
“I am you”
It has your voice,
How I hate you, my goddess,
‘Cause I witHer without Her
Can’t you see… in me?
So try to close your eyes
And seek me as I am
The shine of a freezing sun,
The burning ice under your skin,
The joy I never showed
In all the tears I hid a laugh
So meet me out this place
That I will disappear because…
If the lies of my present are closing the “tomorrow-be” door
Like the echoes from past lives obsess every breath, I am
Where all flowers wither to remember the beauty they lost, and a petal falls
Where in a December tear, dropped under burden of years, it will get drowned
Slowly flow, in this few sap,
That remains in this old tree,
Joys that return when all is lost
Didn’t seem that deeper wounds.
If an hard bark seems to shelter me, by the outside,
It’s in me that you continue to dig…you dig…
There’s a something in my heart
Always running, hiding
With a bit of voice it says:
“Please hear me”
It has my voice
Maybe a shade of myself.
When I wither without me
I don’t want to see
I proclaimed my funeral long time ago
It’s too sad to live my slow travel
Close to Death I danced on my grave
Unconscious of life that flows around
An empty coffin for my stolen future
I waste my strength against nothing made walls
I’m the vampire of my own soul
I burnt me I burnt you for this wretched un-life
Wither…this is what I am for you…
But you never showed that you wanted to understand
You just denied my smiles
And with you
And with you I forgot
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Form of Egotism
It's strange for me thinking that I haven't became someone,
It's strange thinking that I haven't created nothing of important,
It's hard to admit that I haven't started the revolution
And, surely, I'll never start it,
Never lead it, but neither lived it like a pawn
It's painful to see that I won't be what people dream to be,
To find out that I am not, and maybe never been, two steps ahead everyone, anymore
But that I'm there following,
Struggling.
It's worrying to realize that all is blocked,
Knowledge doesn't increase, not understanding everything.
It's humiliating not being able to write anything more,
Leaving blank pages or writing dull phrases,
Being ashamed not to lay bare,
But showing how I fill my emptiness of banalities.
It's discouraging to feel drained of the inmost feelings,
Of that pantheistic love,
Of Her that used to give a sense.
And it's discouraging being able to let Her realize...
How everything is Her child and Her creature:
It's embarrassing to show Her, for how it's ugly and drab.
And not being able to fill Her of me empties me...
It's terrible not being able to get up every day,
Not even being able to follow the everyday, not to move a step,
Being locked in my cage, laying down by my things.
Depression is the most sublime egotism
It's absurd not being able to breathe,
Feeling crushed by my own essence,
The burden of having to be and not wanting to remain,
At least not this way,
And carrying on breathing...breathing…
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be{for[ev(H)er]}
Breath after breath I’ll find peace of mind
Don’t you see? I’m already calming down, right?
After all, when a story ends it's to start another one
As long as you’re able to wait…right?
Right?
Anxiety kills who’s been won by life
Who won the war I fought?
Fear burns the future of who has lost in the past
During all my life
Every time I threw myself to catch each moment
And that way I only lost lots of them
While I rose again from dust
I wanted memories to be the only grip with reality
And the future to be the time for my dreams
I’ll destroy building emptiness
And I wonder
What’s the moment between death and life?
And I wonder: Why?
Are these moments so weak, so fragile?
And I wonder
What’s the instant between love and…
How can I call this moment?
Time(?)…
Before ever there was darkness
Before Her, the cold promised me
That he’d have to come back before
I’d have skimmed delight
Time, you freezed me
In this eternal sunrise eve
The tomorrow of a sunset
Which, you promised, will be forever
Not being
Increases my hunger of reality
Not moving
Increases fear and anxiety
Staring at the others
Increases my regrets
Not finding Her
Is the cause or the effect?
Freezed in cold steel
Grass of the hill
Waves of the sea
An extinguished sphere…and me
Blocked in the movements
Created by memories of a wind
I wait, gazing far away,
The one who will fix my instant
Damned adolescence
I lived a life to please everyone
And I created another one to stay
Beside that a rag of me which advanced
I thought you could lie and now I wanna get out of it
I see I need Her to enter my world while I wonder...
While I wonder
What’s the moment between death and life?
While I wonder: Why?
Are these moments so weak, so fragile?
While I wonder
What’s the instant between love and…
How can I call this moment?
Freezed in cold steel
Grass of the hill
Waves of the sea
An extinguished sphere… and me
Blocked in the movements
Created by memories of a wind
I wait the one who will fix my instant
Freezed in cold steel
Grass of the hill
Waves of the sea
An extinguished sphere… and me
Blocked in the movements
Created by memories of a wind
I wait, gazing far away,
the one who will fix my instant |
And from far away she’ll come
And the wind will start to blow
Releasing every moment
I held there
So this other life will die
So my smiles will make some sense
And my words will have a goal,
Finally clear |
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Right?
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disIllusion
When rage’s gone
The madness slowly flows away
Leavin’ me alone, drained…
But you’re here, again
When I decided to protect me, to shield me…
The body that I clasp is yours, again yours
And I let me go in you
When madness devoured me
(It) Was guided by your hand
That now caresses me, holds me again…again
Your hand that stabs me
It’s again my hope
But I had to remember that
Your eyes are the strongest cage where I stayed and
Your body is the bed of thorns where I bleed
And your lips poison makin’me so fragile…
Where were you, love when you trampled on me while I was at your feet?
Distant worlds unite in brief magic moments…
The magic outline gives weight to the distance
Passion gives weight to this magic
Who knows what chemically happened
In the bad and good
What happened in your, what happened in my, head
What’s the truth? This is the recurring question…
What’s the truth? Where is reality?
Before this, with my certitudes, I felt like a keeper of the truth
When we live the moment, the pleasure without prospect…
We don’t poison the present, yeah,
We don’t prejudice the future…
We don’t invent false objectivity
But where is the truth?
Where is the truth? Where is reality?
Tomorrow has the taste of a thousand yesterdays
Softened by the poison of time
And by the consciousness who asks me to be...unconscious...
What remains besides one night,
Besides the lives that parted
Beside you
Beside me
Beside your eyes
Beside the remembrance who makes mine cry…
Beside the now…what remains?
While our encounter became yet remembrance
While we have nothing more to say...
While you are in contact with everything
And I escape my everything
At least now
While within few hours
I will refuge in it
Your eyes are the fairest fields where I could fly, and
Your soft skin the only bed where I would lay
And your lips, the gate for all the words I need to hear
Please, Love, hold me in your arms, I only need to breathe
Tomorrow has the taste of a thousands dreams I held
Buried in the deepness of my heart
But now I need to scream, to break this wall of silence… please accept our love
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Stream of Unconsciousness
Let me talk about red skies
And minds that are cages where people lay
I'm free to say that the universe is a spark
I'm mad, I'm mad but I'm conscious
Let me live loves without peace
That burn my flesh like a decease
I feel free to embrace
The mad, the sad, the lost, the unconscious
Don't give me the burden to be consequent
'Cause I haven't anymore to force
The future to be different
Maggot's breath
Joint me from inside
'Cause I'm still here immobile.
I dig in the sand without the spade
Searching for my iron castles
But it's strength that I lack,
The air that tires me.
Like when I was a child,
Like when I was alive,
On the grass to paint adventures...alone
Guiding my friends…strong and alone
How I damned you, life,
When you took away my joys
To imagine when you made me human
And I lost the place that I believed was mine
To live this life
Live in this world, rapes time
The thoughts I cannot stop
The demons in my head, waste my mind
To live this life
Live in this world, rapes time
The thoughts I cannot stop
The demons in my head, waste my mind |
Waves always
Wash the sand
Sand clogs
My Lungs
Wounds are covered
By new flesh
New skin
Covers the scars |
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Reconnecting disconnections
Can I find what we lose?
And when the train whistled
Where was I? Where were you?
When (did) he run away with my passion
With my ideals, With my truth?
When (did) he run away with all the lessons
That my scars tell me I have?
Leaves my dirty hands
From my clean mind!
Let me talk about red skies
And minds that are cages where people lay
I'm free to say that the universe is a spark
I'm mad, I'm mad but I'm conscious
Let me live loves without peace
That burn my flesh like a decease
I feel free to embrace
The mad, the sad, the lost, the unconscious
To live this life
Live in this world, rapes time
The thoughts I cannot stop
The demons in my head, waste my mind
To live this life
Live in this world, rapes time
The thoughts I cannot stop
The demons in my head, waste my mind |
Rain still
Cleans tracks
Wind turns
Rock to sand
Wounds are covered
By new flesh
New skin
Covers the scars |
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So I think about my entire life
Every year that passes I fear it could eat me,
But sometimes I’m scared
That everything will remain the same
And when the tragedies will arrive
I will have nothing here with me.
It's strong, the pain, it's strong, this pain
For the thoughts that dance across my head.
For what I need and maybe I can
I want to escape from all the ends
For what I love and I have to mend
I need to end with all those ends.
How I damned you, life,
When you took away my joys
To imagine when you made me human
And I lost the place that I believed was mine
Let me talk about my life
But only (of the) dreams I want to live
I need to write
Like when I was still alive
I’m dead, I’m dead but I’m conscious
Let me live love without peace
Or simply just let me live
I need to say that the universe is a spark
And like the spark, after the burst it crumbles down
Down and down it’s cleaning me
Down and down from memories
Down and down brutality
Down and down remains a beast
Down and down it's eating me
Down and down under my skin
Down and down I’m only this
Beast for beast and beast of me
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But maybe I’ve to understand
That everything is changed
Only one tear at my funeral
And then it starts to spread the rage
The past is gone, the future stands
In cages of ice, the sky is red
I have to be brave, open the gate
And then start to spread the rage |
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back to the top
...As Back Then
Rain
Falls down
In that pool in the ground
I can recognise me
Tears
Sliding
On my face
Carrying memories
They're effacing all
I'm vanishing
Rain
Falls down
In that pool in the ground
You can't recognise me...
You can't recognise me...
In that pool in the ground you can't recognise me
Recalling memories,
This uncurable illness
Associating to the past.
All the happiness
As if they were thoughtless.
Those moments lived
By that childish man
Who dreamed to change the world.
What a lame and dull desire
What germ within himself for his insanity.
I'll find out that it's only a dream, Mother,
I beg you to wake me now.
Wake me now because I'm scared:
I fear what I am
But I fear more what I'll be.
Don't let me think of tomorrow anymore,
I want to remain a child.
And now, as back then rain falls down,
And I still can't find myself
I want to be all that I was
And that I haven't become
I want to get all of what is mine
Or that would have been
To think of what could have been
Even if it isn't come true.
It was me carrying my own cradle,
We cried, we cried because we knew that we couldn't exist
Together anymore and now I feel bound
To embrace my other selves for the last time, and it feels like dying.
And your wrinkles, they scare me so much,
Each white hair and pain are a blow in me
And it feels like dying... and maybe I want to,
Flowing away. In a dream.
I found out that it's only a dream, Mother,
I beg you to wake me now.
Wake me now because I'm scared:
I fear what I am
But I fear more what I'll be.
And now, as back then rain falls down,
And I still can't find myself
I want to be all that I was
And that I haven't become
I want to get all of what is mine
Or that would have been
To think of what could have been
Even if it isn't come true
Don't let me think of tomorrow anymore,
I want to remain a child.
Rain... falls... down...
back to the top
If Silence...
If silence will be my compromise
I'm sure, I can nevermore look at the mirror
If I've to conceal my attitude
I'll be quixotic only in my head
I'll fight with (the) windmill in my brain
Every wound will be for my dignity
But I owe something to my idealism
And I owe something to you
What I say is a need for what I am
Is a cage for me
My dirty home, my beloved maimedness
I believed in what I say more than I ever believed in me
I believed (in) and created my laws and they created my actions, my being
When I realize that words are gone
I also realise that I failed
How can I believe that words can change
If I can't change me
How can I expect the other's aid
With this blood in my hands
How can I pretend that people love
If I just can't feel
If I need to comprehend
It's for my thirst of cognising men
But with you, my pier, my mate
It's not a form of egotism,
I only want to bar the gap
Between me, you and the rest.
The right, the rational, the good
The love, the hope, the desire
The depravation, the gravity, the pain
Words that move or words that kill
I want you to be filled of me
I want you to live of me
I want to be disgusted of me
I want you to have a surfeit of me |
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I just want you to look at me
When I will die at your feet |
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And I'm trying to put an end
In a chapter never closed
It's a ring-a-ring-o'roses
Everybody down the ground
Everybody up
In consequence of this I'm sailing over here
In search of me in you,
This travel will never have a closure
In consequence of this I'm searching all around,
With my lantern,
Diogenes, the man, the man that I am
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Vespro
Madre Follia, lasciami andare via...
Every night closes a circle, and demands answers,
It's a hanging death, that you escape
And you find yourself re-emerging slowly, without saying what had to be said.
Maybe I have tried, writing, to talk about me
To set a point and to create a new beginning
But I realize that I just wandered around
And maybe I have claimed and hoped too much.
I always loved the simple ones, but in me I find contortion, contradictions,
But I want you to believe that I'm sincere, at least now that I say that I'm faulty.
Maybe I'll continue searching forever,
Maybe I'll change and I'll seek the rest...
And still I don't understand,
Mother Madness, have I grown up or not?
Mother, I'll go away, but I'll always be your son.
Mother, let me go away, I'll always be your son.
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